I am beyond tired. I'm on the cusp of being exhausted. Mentally and physically. I don't recall ever feeling like this before. It's not a good sign. Maybe I can just persevere through today and I can make it to an early sleep tonight. Right now, I feel like the left side of my brain is just being scooped out of my head while I just sit here.
Okay, if my productivity is limited at the moment, I suppose I better make the most of it while it's still around at the start of the day.
This is all about subterfuge and mystery and misdirection and so much more. Things are whacky. It's interesting what comes out in conversation when you least suspect it. And why are some things kept under the veil until the last minute? The truth is flexible. That scares me. Is it what I think it was? I'm hardly wrong on that front. Things are strange. It makes sense in one way, but confuses me in so many others.
You know I hate feeling full. Eating so that you're no longer starving is alright, but most of us living good comfortable lives tend to eat to the point of being stuffed. It's grose. It's the ultimate spit in the face for those who have nothing. A lot of people say that eating well is good, because others are starving, so we should make the most of food and not waste it. By that logic, should I spend all my money on frivolous things to make the most of my cash because others are poor? You get what I mean. Eat so that you're always a little bit hungry, and learn to control that. That's my ideal way of living.
That's because I have to exist. Why bother rolling the dice?
Now everything has just cropped up. Oh goody! I'm still with the program! I got this, I got this! I don't got this, I don't got it! That's more appropriate.
Hmmm, on one hand I just want to go the fuck home and sleep. But I also need to get some personal crap taken care of, and I need time for that now. 5.5 hours. Yes, I can do this!
Sometimes it's just nice to get something for nothing, but when you think about it, you are paying some sort of price. I'm with this. I'm with the program. This one. Not any others.
How can an online store of a major departmental chain be out of stock on anything?? That makes no sense at all.
Or maybe it does, and I'm just not willing to listen to it or do anything with it.
Who the fuck is this guy? Psyche, it me!! Hahahahaha.
Too many coincidences. I'm dying here. 2.5 hours. Agony. I think we are running into more uncertainty here. The air is thick with it. It's paralysing.
I'm just going to call it here.
Joaquin out.
