"I'm a million different people from one day to the next"

Things are just incredibly odd. I can't even explain it, not even in a botched illogical way.

I'm going to take some time off later, and then, I can start another introspective into this blog, once again reading through all the posts from the start till now, and seeing how the other and I have changed over time. It should be a hefty read (barring that "lost month" damn it!!).

I also discovered I had some notes in my blognotes which I neglected to post about the last time I actually read my blog notes (which was a hell of a long time ago now, since I seem to blog off the top of my head). But this city has WAY too many cars. Cars that don't seem to follow road rules. I think that's one of the signs of a civilised society, following road rules. But they don't here, so go figure. They'll do their best to speed up when the light first turns green and people are still finishing crossing the road, then catch up to you and beep at you. If that ever happens to me, I'm just going to turn to the driver, walk slower and maybe even blow a kiss, or just shake my head.

Oh yes, an addition to Joaquin's Rate List (JRL) should be coming in several posts or so, it should be a good update!

I seem to be in a haze lately, like I'm not actually here. Sort of like I'm dreaming while I'm awake and doing things. Sort of like there's no consequences if I act out of line. Hmm I wonder what would happen if I did though! Haha, I'm sure it would all come crashing down.

So I pigged out today, and since I didn't exercise very much yesterday, I had to go all out today, and now I am very sore indeed.

What weirds me out is when random nonsensical (and the most obscure) dreams come back to you in reality. Sometimes something so vivid or even something STRAIGHT out of the dream will catch you unawares and all of a sudden you're right back in your dream and then you start losing your grip on reality. Suddenly you don't know what's going on. I had a moment like that today and I have to say I was almost scared to death. My heart was pounding, I was sweating and it all just seemed too strange for my liking.

On a lighter note, now that the weather is heating up, a LOT of women seem to be wearing these short white wrap arounds/dresses, or even white pants/skirts. I'm not that keen on them when these clothes are see through, because most of the time they are made out of VERY sheer material, and you can see STRAIGHT through them. I guess that'd be fine if you were wearing neutral underwear or something. But most of them are wearing black g-strings or in 3 circumstances I saw today, these BRIGHT FLURO BLUE undies!! Like seriously, what the hell?!?!? WHY?!! Why don't you just wear no pants at all?? It's the same effect, and at least you're not hiding behind some pretence of false modesty!! Sheeesh, I just find it funny. I think I need to find some time to get lost around here and explore what's around the corner.

Once I've broken my rusty cage that is... Have a nice day folks!

Low latency

From perhaps what could have been a heart wrenching situation has turned into a place of unknowingness. Hopefully things will turn out ok.

The :11's stalk me at ever corner. I don't know why this is.

I'm going to watch The Deer Hunter tonight, I'm hoping for some awesomeness (even if it is 3 hours, and I am watching MIB first, while playing some guitar) then I gotta be up for some exercise and meeting a friend in the afternoon.

The other has dropped off the face of the planet, I have no idea where he is! Hopefully it's all good.

I've been listening to some Paramore, and I gotta say, they're pretty damn good. Everything they're hyped up to be (for once)!

Anyway, I shall attempt to blog more later, for now some twang twang.

To Say Pain Is The Cleanser Could Be True

I am sooooooooooooooo sore right now. I walked 20kilometres today (12.5 miles) inadvertently, and I was lost. However, using a decent sense of direction I was able to find my way home.

So where was I? I don't even know where the fuck I was, all I know was that it was strange and isolating and I am now glad to be at home.

So this weekend was a write off in essence. I'm hoping to be productive next weekend.

However I did watch a few movies where I was. Amelie (good as always), Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind (good yes, but not as good as what everyone says). I think this is due to it externalising. You don't think so much about the characters but you think of yourself and your relationships in the same circumstances. I also watched Wall Street, which was BLOODY AWESOME. I really loved it, rivetting stuff I must say.

I also was watching WAY too much foxtel. For our American friends, this is pay television. There is just WAY too much stuff to watch. As soon as something gets boring you can just see what else is on, and before you know it, it's like 3am and you're just screwed.

I was mostly addicted to the music channels, but the entertainment channels also got a good workout. I hope I never get it, because I know with the internet and that, I will never get anything done.

I'm aiming to leave work ASAP, as I don't think it's where I want to be. Well I don't think that, I KNOW that. The people are incredibly two faced, and the actual work we are doing has no bearing on society. In fact it's very artifical, like a B Grade Wall Street if you ask me. Where is Gordon Gekko? Haha!

"If you believe, we've got a picture perfect plan, then we've got you fooled, cause we only do the best we can". Too true.

I am rather tired but I'm sure I had so much more to say. Oh well. 2 days of cereal for breakfast and dinner (with no lunch) will do that to you. Then the 20k walk, well sheeit. That's just lunacy. Especially with no idea where you're going.

Till next time people. Too much stuff to do. I'm going to relax next weekend! Have a nice day folks!

Can you hear what I hear, it's calling you my dear, out of reach...

I always get this cold shiver from my back, as if there's a cold breeze right behind me. But there is nobody there.

Tomorrow should be an odd day. Let's see what happens.

All Saints - Pure Shores = awesome.

Who would have thought that mid 90's girlpop could be so good?

I could do with a hit or three

First of all, may I just say YES, the other is back and blogging and everything is right with the world again!

I'm sure that the other will find a place to live very soon and it will be great. I do know what the other is talking about when he mentions the lack of connection to the world over some periods. When I first moved and didn't have a computer, things were great, and it just seemed like a had a lot more time in the day to get things done, and I wasn't being bothered by people at all. Maybe a return to that will be nice. Then again, I am paying a substantial fee to use this service so I guess I better make use of it.

What else? I honestly don't know. It's going to be difficult to say goodbye to the ones you love. That's always the case don't you think?

I love going through tv show junkets. As the other will attest, we get addicted to shows and must watch as much of it as possible in a short period of time. So now I'm watching the latest series that has just come out of the US, and everyone has just grown up, it's freaky!

That's it for now, better make something of this day. I've written 2 songs in 2 days, I'm quite proud of myself. The other has also sent over some riffs that I must say are incredible!! Hopefully the other will keep up his blogging ways. Have a nice day folks!

Eye to the telescope...

I see people everyday, making the same mistakes, over and over. Its a bit depressing. But I'm not judging, I've been there myself. Its a horrid cycle, and hard to break away from. Old habits die hard, and desires are hard to keep from clouding our judgment. But sometimes I wish I could spare some of them the cycle, if there was some way to use our words to explain what people take years to learn (some never learn, this is unfortunate), but I guess life is a process; and everyone needs to traverse the path to learn. Some just fall apart completely, to a point where there is no recovery. To them, I'm sorry my language is fallible, and you can't vicariously learn. I hate to see you drown, but there isn't anything I can do.

It isn't often that I find music that just jumps out at me, and grabs my attention. After the fall, I don't know exactly how I could have heard of them (yeah, I know they are aussie, and I live here, but still). There sound just appeals to me in a way that not many other bands do. I guess the music have to the other band recently that have had the same effect. So if you haven't heard of them, give them a listen.

There is always time for change, embrace it, ride the waves...

I know its been ages...

I know that it has been forever since I've made a post, but its all for a good reason. Life has been moving fast, and I needed every second of it to make it happen the way I could be proud of. The thesis is done now, and so is Uni for me. At least for the time being, time to tackle the real world for a change.

I am now part of the work force... Now its a common shared reality for both the other and I. I can't say that I have much to complain about in that department. Work is good, the kind of things that I want to do, so its not so much of a chore. I also take a lot on my plate, just because I feel its so much easier to be busy, than to not be. Time goes by faster when you're busy, and you get a lot done anyways. Its not like because you're free, you can leave work early; so might as well make the most of the situation that your in. This is my philosophy as least...

Now that I am more relaxed, I can come back to this trusty blog.

For the next few days, the primary mission is to find a place to live. There are a few down sides to this though. 1) its a lot of effort, but it has its rewards (Hell I've lived on campus for way way too long and its time to depart). 2) This means that there is going to be a period of time when I don't have the internet, and this is my greatest annoyance. But it will give me a that break from the cyberworld that we all need from time to time. I'm thinking of getting a ps3 to fill that void. But I think it'll give me an opportunity to do things that I don't end up doing, squandering all my time on the net (well not all my time, but you know what I mean). Every year whenever I used to go back home for a while, I would have a space in my life when I'm disconnected from the world as I know it, and it has usually been a good experience. I don't think I would ever take that break if it wasn't forced upon. Life throws some interesting curve balls, just have to learn to live with it.

Alright, this is where I shall halt for the time being, I'll get back into gear soon enough. Its been a while since I've written what I'm thinking in my head space... I might have forgotten how to verbalize my thoughts... Is this possible??

Tick Toc, bitch - the clock always wins in the end

It does. Time is just running out. I'm not sleeping enough lately. It's stunting me emotionally now I seriously feel like I need to cry for no reason or that I'm about to just drop dead, which may be a relief.

I don't want to do anything anymore. But so much to do, it just never ends. I need some isolation and some quiet and just to be away from people and mundane shitty problems which have suddenly consumed my world.

I had the oddest mexican dish today. It contained the usual salsa, beans cheese etc, BUT it also had cauliflower, apple and carrot - all in the same dish. Like seriously, what the fuck? It tasted ok, but the sheer novelty of it made me not like it. What would Gordon Ramsay say?!

I took a nice walk today and saw some nice parts of the city.

What? I had shitloads to say, but it's 5:30am, and I haven't slept, and I have a fucking packed day of shit shit shit. Time is just running out out out. We're all fucked. Ahhhh.

You know 3am by Matchbox Twenty? Touche. Give or take 3 hours...hahaha! Anyway, let me go and pass out for hopefully 8 or so hours.

I'll comment on my city walk later on, but knowing me, I'll forget what my point was supposed to be. Oh, woe is me. Yep.

Hang me up to dry

I wish I was at least holding down the fort, but that's not even a luxury I can afford anymore.

That may seem totally random, and guess what? It is!!

There's a fort in the middle of nowhere just a bit out of town. It's visually stunning, I'd like to visit it someday, but it's a fair distance away. It's one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. Just a huge stone structure in the top of a hill.

Weekends aren't mine anymore. They are mine, why do they keep being taken away? Oh time time time, just slipping away.

Anyway, I'll try to post a bit more when I'm actually lucid.