Monday, May 07, 2012

She Kissed All The Boys & Made Me Cry

It's incredibly sad, and a sorry indictment on my current job that I can be away from work sick for a week and come back, and absolutely nothing has happened. I thought I'd have a lot to do, and I do not. They're paying me an income well above the average Australian wage, yet I am hardly doing anything, and yet there are people busting their butts out there, and are struggling to survive. It's not really a fair world, is it? I've doubled my salary in 4 years. I wonder if I can keep that up? Sold my bike, and just deposited the funds from that, and I'm also expecting our landlord to cough up damages for not making required repairs to the heater. Essentially, I will have made 10 thousand dollars in one week, and that's quite fucked up. I
remember when I first started working, and I was barely making anything, considering living expenses and what not, and now I'm technically rolling in it. I suppose this is vindication? Someone could kill me tomorrow and it would not make a difference to anything.

I've been reading up on asthma, since I've had a disease induced episode of it at the moment. It's not a great affliction to have, it's just so invasive to your life. Genetic and environmental factors play a very large part in determining whether you will develop it, and interestingly, rates of asthma have increased considerably since the 1970s. That's truly terrifying, I wonder what could be behind that? I'm hoping that I recover soon so that I don't have to worry about it anymore, but for so many millions of people out there, they have to live with the disease everyday.

Diablo 3 is expected to be out shortly, which is not good news for me! Doesn't matter anyway, as I don't expect to be playing that when it comes out. I still have to play Diablo 2, where I lost my saved game
when my computer went nuts last time. So I think I'll just download a finished game from the net and then try to finish it off quickly, since I just want to see how the story ends.

Been playing some Shogun 2 Total War, as well as the Britannia expansion on Medieval 2 Kingdoms. Wow, it had been so long since I had played one of these games at the start, I had forgotten how hard
it is to actually get the balance right between building the economy and an army. I typically remember mid to end game, where it doesn't matter how large your army is, since army upkeep will never overtake
the income derived from so many settlements. But at the start, that's entirely different. I'm getting smashed left right and centre, and I've even lost a few towns in both games, and have lost battles that I otherwise should have won. Kudos to the Creative Assembly for strengthening the AI into Shogun 2, cause they fight dirty when they need to! Siege battles are a bit more of an ordeal though, since it really does rely on the adage that you need to outnumber existing settlements 3-1 in order to comfortably win. At least my armies have experience, so they're not as likely to run when they're getting smashed. I'll get there, slowly but surely. I shall wrest control back!

Watched a lot of movies over the weekend, with some good standouts including Wall Street 2 and Black Swan. Fargo, the Disappearance of Alice Creed and Paranormal Activity 3 were a bit more forgettable.

Have you ever done something so wrong, so detestable that you had to keep it a secret from everyone? What do you do when that secret is a shared one? Folie a deux indeed.

Need to check what month this blog started up, so I can arrange for the latest round of the intro/retrospective to take place.


I'm apprehensive as to what your answer may be. You will probably say no, or that you're too busy, or that you just don't want to talk. Maybe I'll need to manipulate you. Why? Cause I want to see you. It's as simple as that. Just to look at you and make sure you're ok. Cause I miss you. Cause I love you. And I wish I did not, but there really isn't much else to say. You're going through on your own pretending nothing has happened, and that worries me. Or maybe it's just what you need. But I want to find out for myself. Why do I obsess over you so much? It's not healthy! I guess Blu Cantrell was right - when love hurts, it won't work.


Well whatever.  Joaquin out.
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