The Dead Of Night

None of this is right.  What the hell is going on?  I'm having broken sleep these past few nights.  I wake up randomly at odd times and just wonder what time it is.  What really got to me last night was the dead silence.  There was nothing.  No ambient sound, no crickets chirping, no late night people out and about.  It was just nothing.  If I had shut my eyes, I'm sure that's what death would be like.  Absolute nothingness, and no consciousness.  It was odd.

I've really gotta start making the effort.  But I'm enjoying the sleep.  I need to be stronger.  What's more important to you? 

Don't worry about me, I'm just lost in a state of confusion.  What the hell is going on?  Not that it should concern me anyway, but it does.  It always finds a way to.

I haven't played guitar in so long that I fear that I'll never be able to play again.  That I'll never be competent enough to play as well as I once did.  My nails have grown, but it doesn't matter, because I haven't even picked up a guitar.  Life has just become weird.  From out of nowhere!  It's like life is not agreeing with me, and I'm on the outer.

Hmmm I suppose I'd better get some work done.  It's scary to think it's all random.  Or maybe there's comfort in that.  You can't control anything.

Oh man, 3 hours of this still to go?  I can't believe it.  Why am I bothering?  I can just give up here.  This spot.  That's where I draw the line and make a stand. 

I'd rather nothing than this.  I make the opposite decision to Shinji.  Some people are just walking billboards for the term 'bitchface'.

This has just been a whacky day.  I want to go home an eat.  Just eat till I can't eat anymore.  Hahahaha.  But I've still got an hour to go. 

On second thoughts, maybe I'll just keep it to myself :)  It doesn't help that I've already blabbed though!

Joaquin out.